Now, Lampent is a ghost I can get behind! It’s got a fancy little hat, it’s made of fire and fibreglass*, and it’s making a good effort to be spoooooky without being SCAAAAARY! What with its curly, wavy arms and big “boooOOOoooOOOoooOOO” face. I’d be a bit squeaked at the sight of Lampent, perhaps a tad frazzled, but I’d never be scared to death. A ghost for the people, indeed!
*It might not be fibreglass at all, but “fire and fibreglass” is a catchy phrase so that’s what I’m sticking with.
Alright. Alright. I’m gonna break it down for you.
FIRST! Ghost/Fire. Ghost/Fire. Type. Ghost/Fire type.Wondrous.
SECOND. It’s a candle. It’s a candle Pokémon. Never would’ve happened in G1. They were still stuck on “just a ghost, that’s it, just literally a ghost” in G1.
THIRD? It’s adorabeezle. Its melty wax is covering one of its eyes like a cutie cartoon goth girl stereotype, and it’s got a smile so wide it’s practically curling in on itself. This is love distilled into its purest form: that of a Pokémon which looks like a tiny melting candle.
…Whew! I kept my cool! I’m proud of myself. I only used one exclamation point that whole time. I was worried my unbreakable, immortal love of Litwick would finally send me to my breaking point, but I made it!
Much like how “Elgyem" is a play on LGM (little green man), "Beeheeyem" is a play on BEM (bug-eyed monster), the other now-outdated extraterrestrial type that was once a staple of 30s-50s pulp fiction. Beeheeyem’s eyes are not especially buggish, but I guess they do have a small amount of bugginess to them, perhaps just enough to be considered a BEM.
What it undeniably DOES have, however, is adorable hot-dog legs. Look’a those legs. Just delicious.
I love this one so much. It’s so clever. “Elgyem”, as in “LGM”, get it? ‘Cause it’s an alien! And its hands even look like those Martians from the old War of the Worlds movie!
Huh, well, this is a surprise. Eelektrik was so terrifying that you’d probably expect its evolution to be even worse, but actually this one’s pretty cute. It’s posing like a puppy and it’s all round and shiny, like a baby. It even looks like it has buck teeth! Ahyuk!
Sweet lord, there is something deeply wrong about Eelektrik. Behold its eye:
There are no deep thoughts in that eye. It is not thinking about anything except death. Murder. The death of its opponent, at its own hands. Death by that hideous, all-encompassing, soul-sucking appendage that it dares to call a mouth.
Tynamo is most notable for being (along with its evolutions) the only Pokémon out there with absolutely no weaknesses. Oh, it’s damaged normally by most attacks, and is resistant to a few (and unaffected by Ground), but there is no move that’s super-effective against it.
It balances this out by otherwise being pretty weaksauce, and by looking impressively similar to a sperm.
There’s that same gear again, oy. Still, Klinklang looks pretty cool- dig that huge barbed ring! That’s super-intimidating! Why that looks like it could tear a sucker to little ribbons.
Seriously? By Generation V I’d have expected Game Freak to be well above the cheap evolutionary ploy of “put more of the thing on the previous thing” last seen with Dugtrio and Magneton, but I guess not. Look at this- the gear with a face is literally the exact same gear that’s on the left side of Klink!
I’ve always said that we need more Steel-types (actually I don’t think I ever have, but I’ve always thought it, so ha!), and Klink is a more than welcome addition to the pantheon. Sure, the fact that it’s made up of two distinct pieces brings up disturbing implications of a hiiiiiive miiiiiiind (aaarhaudjflablblflablflabl) much like Exeggcute and Combee, but both pieces are pretty cute and it’s a lovable Pokémon, so I give it a pass!